{"id":16974,"date":"2023-07-14T20:51:13","date_gmt":"2023-07-14T20:51:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/?p=16974"},"modified":"2026-04-12T18:55:46","modified_gmt":"2026-04-12T18:55:46","slug":"premeditatio-malorum-some-thoughts","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/2023\/07\/14\/premeditatio-malorum-some-thoughts\/","title":{"rendered":"Premeditatio malorum – my practice and thoughts"},"content":{"rendered":"
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A little Ted Lasso .gif clip to set the stage here.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n
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What is – Premeditatio malorum? A definition of sorts to start<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
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Premeditatio malorum : “The exercise of imagining things that could go wrong or be taken away from us. It helps us prepare for life\u2019s inevitable setbacks. We don\u2019t always get what is rightfully ours, even if we\u2019ve earned it. Not everything is as clean and straightforward as we think they may be. Psychologically, we must prepare ourselves for this to happen.”<\/p>Ryan Holiday<\/cite><\/blockquote><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Here is a link to some more thoughts on the subject from Ryan Holiday’s perspective – link to Ryan Holliday’s thoughts at his Daily Stoic blog<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Life. It is hard. It is messy. It is beautiful. It is life!<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

It doesn\u2019t mean it won\u2019t happen or it will happen! Life isn\u2019t really fair, so what? So, if it does happen, it does. If it doesn\u2019t happen, it doesn\u2019t! The practice of Premeditatio malorum helps me in adapting and responding. Does it make it easier to accept the difficulties or evils or hardships that I may encounter? Not at all! What it does do is help me shape my disposition and responses to difficult things. Life is full of many interactions which I have no control! So, I seek and strive to focus on what I can control. My response to the stimulus!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A huge observation and challenge I often see is over-thought! It is my observation that over intellectualizing and not including action can be truly difficult, too. So while I may anticipate to have a generally good day, I try to be ready in case it isn\u2019t and try to maintain a cheerful disposition either way.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

Another way to spell perfection is \u2018paralysis\u2019!<\/em><\/p>Winston Churchill<\/cite><\/blockquote><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

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Pathological Demand Avoidance and its effects<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

CAN’T Not Won’t!<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Something interesting to include here is the example of\u00a0Pathological Demand Avoidance<\/a>. Two of my kiddos don\u2019t necessarily have the option to respond with agency like I do between a stimulus and response. Instead they barrell right into fight or flight responses! While current resources tend to focus on behavioral approaches, those applications and methods fail when PDA (a biological and neuro disruptive condition) is indeed present. The disruption is often neurological at its root. It is commonly accompanied by anxiety and other fight or flight responses (Fight, Flight, Freeze, Freeze, Fawn\/Flop, Funster, Fib – as the emerging examples) skip the pathways that enable generally logical and\/or reasonable humans to navigate the space of stimulus and response. It is a journey rife with aspirations, lessons learned, failures and successes. From the outside looking in, I observe many who don\u2019t understand my family\u2019s challenges\/opportunities and superpowers and super failures. So we tarry on fatigued, exasperated at times, and hopeful for opportunities to continually improve and grow. <\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

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PDA INFO – Zentriathlete Link<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Looking for info about PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance)<\/a><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 <\/strong>Definitions<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 <\/strong>PDA<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 <\/strong>Story<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 <\/strong>Parenting<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 <\/strong>Accomodations<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 <\/strong>Disability<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 <\/strong>Support<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 <\/strong>Fears<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Podcast by Sage Family and Casey Ehrlick<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n
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Life. It is hard. It is messy. It is beautiful. It is life!<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n
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Marcus Aurelius approaches I employ<\/a><\/h3>\n\n\n\n