{"id":24921,"date":"2026-03-08T00:43:21","date_gmt":"2026-03-08T00:43:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/?p=24921"},"modified":"2026-04-12T20:56:07","modified_gmt":"2026-04-12T20:56:07","slug":"tqohaawlohgskobm","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/2026\/03\/08\/tqohaawlohgskobm\/","title":{"rendered":"Three Questions, One Hill, and a Whole Lot of Heart – GS kiddos on Beaver Mountain"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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A Favorite Number, and the Quiet Work of Courage<\/h3><\/div>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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Today didn\u2019t start smoothly. It was chaotic in the way mornings with kids often are \u2014 gear everywhere, emotions running high, and a troop of girl scouts carrying their own mix of excitement, fear, and uncertainty. With the neurodiversity in the group, and a few WTF questions from my wife, I\u00a0 recalibrated. The mountain wasn\u2019t the goal. Mastery wasn\u2019t the goal. What mattered was presence, connection, and giving each girl a first experience that felt safe enough to be her own.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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So I focused on three simple questions:<\/span><\/p>

    • Are you having fun?<\/strong><\/span><\/li>
    • \u00a0Are you staying dry?<\/strong><\/span><\/li>
    • \u00a0Did you learn to stop?<\/strong><\/span><\/li><\/ul><\/li><\/ul>

      Those became my compass for the day \u2014 a small act of temperance, narrowing the field to what actually matters.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      Yes,\u00a0 m<\/span>y old instructor instincts surfaced \u2014 wedge, pizza, tips together, don\u2019t cross \u2014 but those cues were too dense for the state they were in. Too many words. Too much demand on kids already working hard just to stay regulated. Technique wasn\u2019t the answer. Temperance and kindness were.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      So I reframed.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      I began to really observe as each girl stepped through the snow.\u00a0 I watched their nervous systems shift: i observed the unspoken stories \u2014 the freeze in their shoulders, the quick glances at peers, the hesitant steps, the quiet why are we doing this<\/em> that shows up in their eyes long before it reaches their words. Snow, cold, novelty, peers, and the pressure of trying something new in front of others \u2014 it was a full load for them to carry.\u00a0 And the early friction I felt felt dissolved once I slowed down enough to see and recognize what was happening –\u00a0 they weren\u2019t resisting instruction; they were simply overwhelmed.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      I switched the focus from me teaching – focusing on technique and concentrated on building connection.\u00a0 I asked each girl her age, where she went to school, and then \u2014 the key \u2014 her favorite number.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      It seems small, but it changed everything.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      Their favorite number became the shorthand for all the instructions they didn\u2019t have the bandwidth to hold. Instead of \u201cmake a pizza,\u201d I could say, \u201c8, or 0, or 100, or 3,\u201d and they knew what to do – “make a pizza” and gain control and slow or stop!. One number replaced a whole sentence. One number gave them control. One number helped them stop.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

      And something shifted.\u00a0 Their little capable bodies and brains aligned.\u00a0 They demonstrated behavioral literacy and learned the basics of skiing.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      Even the most strong\u2011willed, demand\u2011avoidant girl \u2014 the one who needed the most space and the most patience \u2014 resonated with it. She came up afterward and thanked me. An eight\u2011 or nine\u2011year\u2011old, looking me in the eye and saying, \u201cThanks for being patient with me.\u201d The younger ones \u2014 three five\u2011year\u2011olds and my own girls \u2014 answered the same three questions with smiles.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      Nearby, the traditional ski\u2011school assembly line rolled on \u2014 equipment explanations, technical breakdowns, the familiar choreography of my past life on the mountain. I felt the camaraderie of my past life on the mountain fade away and the carousel of comfort shift!\u00a0\u00a0Today required something different.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      Today required temperance<\/strong> \u2014 restraint from defaulting to old habits. It required courage<\/strong> \u2014 choosing connection over correctness. It required wisdom<\/strong> \u2014 reading the girls\u2019 emotional landscapes and adjusting the teaching to match their nervous systems, not my old training.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      And underneath all of it was gratitude.<\/span><\/p>

      Gratitude for the chance to support these girls. Gratitude for the trust they offered. Gratitude for the small moments \u2014 a smile, a number, a stop \u2014 that told me they felt safe enough to try, and ultimately, to learn.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      What it taught me as a dad and caregiver?<\/h3><\/div>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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      Standing on that hill, I was reminded that caregiving isn\u2019t about having “ALL: the right answers “ALL” the time\u2014 it\u2019s about having the right posture. It\u2019s about meeting kids where they are, not where systems or pressure says they should be. It\u2019s about noticing the tremble in a voice, the hesitation in a stance, the way a child looks at the snow before she looks at you. It\u2019s about remembering that courage isn\u2019t loud; sometimes it\u2019s a five\u2011year\u2011old whispering her favorite number and trusting you to guide her.\u00a0 It’s the paiing of my empathy providing them a plaatform for their courage to flourish and be cultivated through their actions, supported by mine!<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      Today reminded me that my job isn\u2019t to push my girls \u2014 or any girl \u2014 up the mountain. My job is to walk beside them long enough for them to find their own footing. To offer steadiness without taking over. To create conditions where autonomy can grow.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      Everyone is home now. Quiet. Tired. Content.<\/span><\/p>

      A day shaped by courage, tempered by patience, guided by wisdom, and held together by gratitude.<\/span><\/p>

      A win.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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      \n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\"\"\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

      A Favorite Number, and the Quiet Work of Courage Today didn\u2019t start smoothly. It was chaotic in the way mornings with kids often are \u2014 gear everywhere, emotions running high, and a troop of girl scouts carrying their own mix […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":21288,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"nf_dc_page":"","_eb_attr":"","pagelayer_contact_templates":[],"_pagelayer_content":"","rs_blank_template":"","rs_page_bg_color":"","slide_template_v7":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-name":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-description":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[811,817],"tags":[824,825,826,827],"class_list":["post-24921","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-2026-check-ins","category-prnci","tag-tag-st","tag-tag-agency","tag-tag-discernment","tag-tag-autonomy"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24921","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=24921"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24921\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":24930,"href":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24921\/revisions\/24930"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/21288"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=24921"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=24921"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/happyinthehills.com\/zentriathlete\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=24921"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}