Checkin’ IN!!!
Dear younger self. It wasn’t your fault! ~~ Alex Elle
So, this past week has been all about ‘feel’ and re acquainting myself with a growth mindset. We saw some genuinely horrific scenes this past week on the soil of the USA. So much so, the aristocracy, the peasants and the media and social outlets are so entrenched in it, there is nothing but this chaos and noise. I try so hard to acknowledge and accept that it is there, but not openly engage in its fury. I most succeed in that. Other times, I mistakenly with fervor, embellish a provocateurs’ foolishness and jump in with reckless abandon. Reminds me of my relationship and journey with triathlon. I still recall that ill-fated decision where I turned right instead of left, and completed, naw survived a 100 mile bike ride I was ill-prepared for, nevertheless, I completed it. And as they say, so it goes.
I missed my opportunity to sign up for the 70.3 Ironman in St. George. To be honest it is unclear if we are in a place where branded events of scale will occur this year. So, Liz and I couldn’t secure the lodging we tend to use, so we drug our feet, and now I am on a waiting list. Want to hear something fun? Liz is contemplating a 70.3! How ridiculously cool is that. Wouldn’t it be ironic if this year is shelved if she finds a way to sneak in completing a Full Ironman before me. Would be a propos of our relationship and it would be pretty cool, but I may have to be jealous. Regardless, I am in the trows of getting things geared up. I signed up for Rouvy and have ridden multiple times now. I much prefer its option to virtual riding to Zwift. That is my preference and I am all in for a year. The nice thing about Rouvy, is Liz can use it too. Maybe we can do just that. I also renewed my subscription for Training Peaks and even found a worthwhile discount to help lessen the sting of the annual 120 a year cost. Yes, yes I support the tool, it still sucks to have to purchase it as subscription based.
Swim
My swim has been the most favorable thus far. In last week’s post I mentioned that I began to change over to recording 10 minute blocks. I did this again and found freedom and ease of reaching the time and distance metrics I need. I also found it easier to concentrate on overall form, and not getting lazy. I was able to concentrate on the important little details in my personal stroke which I hope will pay off large dividends in the future. I am starting to re-identify with my form , comfort, and feel in the water. I feel that my overall fitness is still a bit off into the future and hope I can make a few gains before that starts to truly settle in. I have a few instances where i was able to force myself among all the other swimmers to just swim my swim and not get carried away and try to keep up with “laneside larry”! I even found myself while being chatted up with by Dale on Sat – super nice older gent, calling over to a fellow on the poolside making sure he get in a lane he likes. Remember the weird abrupt guy that sharked my lane the other week. Another snorkel wearing type did similar to another swimmer. I know the other swimmer loosely from my friend Gustavo, and well, I was glad to watch the example of this friend of a friend. You could tell, like I was, he was a bit put off, but good thing there were enough lanes and it seemed his set was much shorter than settling into a ‘preferred’ lane. I h.ope this is one of the few times that I mention this scenario. So my swim technique feels good. I have had a few more people ask me how I swim so fast with a PB, and I just take it in stride and as a compliment. I tend to tell them the PB, for me, allows me to concentrate on my pull, catch and my whole stroke pattern and it helps me be best engaged in the overall swim technique for me. Further, I have been focusing on engaging my core and not getting loose and remaining straight. Sure I don’t always swim on top of the lane stripe because I like swimming the lane rope to help me engage a bit more in a type of swim similar to OWS – I pretend the lane rope is another swimmer, I so I leanr to hold my line and own my space.
Bike
So far this is a bit mixed. IN fact it has been making me hold off a bit on running. I don’t know if it is nerves, trying to be careful or me just being overly cautious. Since the NOv 23 procedure – a vasectomy – I have had about 4 overall rides – most last week. I have not felt any pain or numbness yet!
Run
Will have more here in the future as I am trying to get my comfort level back on the bike. Trying to find a way to fit it all in has been fun.
Headspace
“If you wish to control others you must first control yourself”
― Miyamoto Musashi, A Book of Five Rings: The Classic Guide to Strategy
Lately, these 4 little humans (our beloved kidlet/sherpas) disrupt the opportunity for me to get a full and wholesome night of sleep. Saturday, we took occasion to visit Target in Riverdale (Utah) for some arguably, needful things. Juniper and Astrid ran through target like it was Disneyland. For me, I observed a few people in awe of their energy – some looked like they absolutely missed this in their life, others were grumpy or aloof. In the end, the girls didn’t break down, though we walked up to that cliff’s edge and flirted with it a few times for sure.
It made me stop, and realize, as I tried to help the girls be mindful and self aware of the impact of our choices – germs, what is and isn’t appropriate levels of excitement and associated screams of glee – while in a public shopping store. I realize how privileged I am to bask in the freedoms I have. To have agency and the outward and inward opportunities to execute my free-will mostly without friction. Oft times the friction comes from unrealistic expectations cast upon me or my family – and that leads to varying levels of resentment.
UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS ARE JUST FUTURE RESENTMENTS ~~ Coach Robbie Bruce (C26 Founder)
I also observed strangers that appear to be busy and rushed for little more than to be busy or rushed. Given the current state of affairs, I have many observations which I choose to share only when I feel it to be most appropriate. Because of my recent Ironman training (privilege), work impacts and associated stressor (another privilege) and my duties as husband and father, I feel stretched.
Its not yet to the breaking point, but I am fatigued, But don’t despair, its merely to levels where hope feels empty of grace and I seek for a willingness to strive for something better.
I am in awe, silent awe of how others before me kept their proverbial poop together enough thru their times of challenge and struggle. As parents, as humans, and as they, I imagine often relinquished and sacrificed their personal wants and desires to the overall betterment of their nuclear families and immediate circles of influence.
During the outing I mentioned above to Riverdale, we also stopped at In n’ Out – soon maybe there will be one in town (Logan in Cache Valley county and city permits are filed and been made public, now we wait)!!! ? The drive-thru was LONG, so I chose to go inside.
Where I was stopped and asked to wait outside because the numbers inside were too high. The gentleman next to me starts to quip “this is ridiculous”, to which I respond -‘ yes, it could be worse, we could be travelling across the plains, and arriving here in Utah without the greater parts of our family and company – like with a whole new set of people’, then I paused upon a quick reflection and stated ‘that’s kind of happening now and we are all trying to figure out how to prevent more negative impact than necessary ‘. The bewildered gentleman then stated ‘ I hadn’t thought of it like that’. Well we sat silent, then I asked him after about 3 minutes of silence if he was from around Riverdale/Ogden, he responded quickly and with a tone of “I don’t know or want to interact with you.” Oh well.
Again reflecting on what is most precious to me, and my kidlets are merely part of that. For this reason, I choose to be kind, to take actions, to be tolerant and mindful of my choices, decisions, actions and their primary, secondary and potential tertiary impacts. I try to be present, engaged and thoughtful. I fail all the darned time. I’m frustrated by my imperfections – I have many. But I am grateful I was provided an opportunity to develop skills vital to me interacting with other humans. Life is most precious, and I feel it is worth the efforts to provide opinions for other humans to do similar.
It has been my observation in recent years that in theory and philosophically most humans tend to agree about inalienable rights, however it is in the execution of how we might provide or protect or actively exercise and execute how these things should be preserved is where all hell breaks loose and preservation of life liberty and the pursuit of happiness falls prey to risk. This ties to triathlon and life b/c this is how lifestyle, mindset and coaching all intersect in theory and application and execution. Oft-times we just need to be observe and be a bit more patient.
So in that vein, I invite others and myself, to review your internal expectations of yourself and others. Are these expectations reasonable? Or are they just future resentments? I invite you to ask yourself and your immediate family what you might do to focus on how precious life is, how grateful you are, and reset and recalibrate where necessary. I invite you to step past the ‘line in the sand you drew’ and anything that is or may be preventing persistent iterative growth opportunity in your life. I invite you to be more tolerant, self aware, mindful and ultimately to choose to be in control of your own thoughts, feelings and emotions and not let the noise of the day rattle your cage and incite you to act foolishly.
So there it is, sleepless nights, restless children prompting my scattered thoughts. I anticipate very few to read my thoughts here, but if you do, I am privileged to be considered your friend, associate, colleague or perceived misunderstood associate. I thank you for that esteemed title and it is my hope you leave enough grace for yourself and others to earn the title of friend too.
Some meaningful quotes I have happened across:
“Think lightly of yourself and deeply of the world”
― Miyamoto Musashi, A Book of Five Rings: The Classic Guide to Strategy
“Get beyond love and grief: exist for the good of Man.”
― Miyamoto Musashi, A Book of Five Rings: The Classic Guide to Strategy
My thoughts/actions to track:
So, What will I do to move forward? A few of my present thoughts –
- Relentless forward progress in my personal growth mindset, nimble enough to persistently adapt to what I need to recalibrate or change.
- Accept my ignorance of what I do not know and exert the correct level of effort to replace that ignorance with truths.
- Be patient in observation and not fooled by perception’s hunger to be too swift.
- One step, one action, one decision, one day a time.
- Shape my own world or someone else will.
- Don’t assume anything of another than if they could, they will or can.
- Love my family as authentically as I can.
- Keep moving forward.
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