I generally try to avoid political posts, but the invasion of Ukraine is a moment where I think it’s appropriate.

Thoughts I am trying to digest in my headspace

Lamia, in Classical mythology, is/was a female daemon who devoured children. The ancient commentaries on Aristophanes’ Peace say she was a queen of Libya who was beloved by Zeus. When Hera robbed her of her children from this union, Lamia killed every child she could get into her power. It is indeed sad how this mirrors the ill-effects today. From trafficking, war crimes, and more – it is not courage to wield children as leverage. Nor is apathy an acceptable alternative.

Thoughts from the Good Monsignor in The Boondock Saints

The opening scene in The Boondock Saints included a story by the aged Monsignor (William Young) –
“And I am reminded, on this holy day, of the sad story of Kitty Genovese. As you all may remember, a long time ago, almost thirty years ago, this poor soul cried out for help time and time again, but no person answered her calls. Though many saw, no one so much as called the police. They all just watched as Kitty was being stabbed to death in broad daylight. They watched as her assailant walked away. Now, we must all fear evil men. But there is another kind of evil which we must fear most, and that is the indifference of good men.”

Narcissistic injury, also known as “narcissistic wound” or “wounded ego” are emotional traumas that overwhelm an individual’s defense mechanisms and devastate their pride and self worth. The good ole’ Freud maintained that “losses in love” and “losses associated with failure” often leave behind injury to an individual’s self-regard.

These are some of the circular references that my mind is trying to digest. As a father of 4 children who would be used by some as leverage, it is hard and difficult to not acknowledge thoughts, feelings, perceptions and process them in a manner that is healthy and responsible for me and my direct family – as I witness war acts and actions that represent evil.

Volodymyr Zelenskyy – President of the Ukraine

I’ve recently come to an understanding that empathy is where some of the most valuable courage is birthed. A current living example is the Ukrainian President. While many of the world are too busy parsing narrative, perception and whatever other justification you wish to stand behind – Volodymyr Zelenskyy just stepped up as he has apparently done since day one.

Amid critical world events, President Zelenskyy is giving a living TED talk, nay an actionable on-site clinic of leadership and courage. He is just a family man. But under the crucible in the role of President of the Ukraine, thank you to the Zelenskyy’s for standing up to evil. Be it known I don’t have enough exposure other than knowing of his Jewish descent, how his acting and law career positioned him to become president of Ukraine. Further I don’t know much about his tendencies, but in this moment – he stands in this “Can’t hurt me” position after trying to reason with a maniacal despot that is unwilling to use diplomacy. Mr. Putin is standing behind weapons of mass destruction and armies. Not all value has courage, but in this moment where Ukrainian’s from all walks of life, answer the call to arms, it is a truly a demonstration of empathy and courage that is a privilege to witness.

Another Volodymyr Zelenskyy quote:

Mr. Zelenskyy you are a very welcomed breath of fresh air. Even in my blush readings, I hope in days to come that your actions and history embolden you and your homeland into the future. One last observation and quote :

“Please let me quote one American actor who turned into a great American president. The government is not here to solve all our problems, the government is our problem. It’s just a quote. “

Volodymyr Zelenskyy

Work and LinkedIn like thoughts

I really believe in this concept above. Recalibrating goals and desired outcomes to potentials will and does change quotas. In more recent experiences this concept has helped me wade through interview processes I am an active participant in. It has also helped me focus in on the candidates true value add proposition and foster more meaningful and appropriate conversations. Amid all the current chaos and noise of the human experience I am finding more and more appreciation in the wealth of talent and opportunity candidates bring to the interview process.

I find alignment is the biggest elephant in the room. I find unrealistic expectations just lead to future resentments. However, when things line up, that’s where amazing happens. I am grateful to be an active witness as I trust this concept. Experience and wisdom often arrives; however, without empathy there is no courage. It is my hope that employers and employees stop and take inventory of their value add propositions from time to time. The current de facto standards (the process) to apply and interview are ridiculous. Many expectations of applicants are ridiculous too. It is time to recalibrate or just accept the frustration until alignment occurs.

Another thing I am witnessing is how perception and reality are often misrepresented and skewed in the whole de fact interview process. One candidate directly expressed how the ‘conversational’ approach was appreciated. This candidate visibly dropped shoulders and the countenance of this individual came to the forefront. Now, it is not to say that the stress associated with the process disappears. Rather, it merely allows for a flatter and more ‘real’ environment to explore fit and opportunity. As this process is on-going, I prefer not to explore much more than generalities. Maybe in the future I can share some lessons learned along the way, maybe not.

Back to triathlon and lessons learned in training

This week I have been highly concentrating on cycling. It is my current feeling that I can build base here with most consistency. All things considered, life, weather, family responsibilities and work. Then there are these two rugrats we call our quadrapeds. Zoe and Apollo. These two escape artists even got me to sneak in an off-plan 1 mile sprint. I had to capture Apollo off leash. I was able to stay close enough. I didn’t have time to grab a leash. It was a door dash as I realized our fencing barrier was compromised and off I went. As I closed in and got into Apollo’s attention span. I called, turned and he began to chase me until he was on my side. I collared him up and homeward we trotted.

I highlight this story because there are too many unknowns in training. I am watching on the socials a group around the Rouvy platform I use. Look, my approach doesn’t match many others as I have come out of the competitive headspace outside of me vs. me. I find so many are so lost in measurements they are at risk of the benefits of the journey. This is where i am grateful for people like my wife. She doesn’t come right out and say it often – but she requires a growth mindset of me. Ultimately enabling myself to encounter, recognize, observe and take actions to improve. Sometimes I hit the mark, often though I am re-calibrating similar to work. I am chasing potentials not quotas. A look under the covers provides a glimpse into how I internalize and strive for improvements. First for me and my benefit, then my relationships (My wife, family, friends and colleagues).

What I am liking most right now is seeing the simple gains in rediscovering my base. I have long wanted to be able to find a better cadence, and that is coming, That for me has come by being on my smart trainer. I am boosting my muscle memory and it allows me to concentrate on my horrible pedal stroke. I am able to sense the small differences that change into the muscle groups I am not often available to understand while riding outdoors. Don’t get me wrong, I would prefer to be outside, but I have to manage things far beyond my control. I kid you not, I have had those in my circle of influence tell me how much they hate cyclists even to the point where they would – verbally – “Run them over”. This is a stress that is highly top of mind each ride. My top goal each ride in my local valley – get home safe. That stress is COMPLETELY removed while I ride indoors.

Anyway, I was just under my 100 miles for the week goal, but with the impromptu runs after those sneaky quadrapeds, I am feeling it in my legs. Someone shared in the C26 space a meme of Bruce Bannon about to go to hulk and change the meme to this:

Now I have the fun of loading in the rest of the activities and being mindful of volume and strength. This looks different each time, but the principles are generally the same. The fun part about being self-coached and – my wife chips in as well, is managing the unseen stressors that come with managing a plan. This isn’t my profession, nor am I doing it for compensation. In fact, this is my hobby. I love it, I am passionate about it. I know enough to be dangerous and use it as a growth opportunity where I can experiment and use in the other vectors of life. Triathlon has given me much, and this is how I try to use it to be ready and positioned to share my lessons learned when appropriate. A major lesson learned is “unsolicited advice rarely sticks” and “unrealistic expectations are just future resentments”. My hobby in triathlon has reunited me with stoic philosophy, re-awakened and provides me grounding in life and work and with people. I personally have more that I should give back as I have with gratitude received a lot. To that end I will end with a quote from stoicism: