Memories on Facebook prompted a look in the rear view mirror of life. Years ago we concluded out adventures in Paris, during the chapter of life known as the Liz Livingston, Shane and Dennis show. Little did we know that efforts and patience and misunderstandings and hindsight and stubbornness would allow us to years later extend our home to 4 children when we couldn’t see how to have more than just one!
It is NOT, nor has it always been blissful. It is nowhere near perfect. I, myself, as an example, often find out how incorrect I am. I then have to adapt. I course correct and try to incrementally improve. I can only control what I can control and I try my best not to give into the thief of comparison. Liz and I try our best and generally do our best.
We have opened our home to a few vagabonds along the way. We try to allow our kids to see through the example of action not just intellectual faith. It applies a pressure on us, and requires us to be resourceful and resilient! Ever changing and growing! I don’t know that we know what respite is. It took a 3 week trip for international surgery during covid and luckily Liz’s parents and my birth mother, stopping and sacrificing and helping steer our other kiddos to not destroying themselves or others in our absence. To give the appearance of a break. Mind you! Liz had back surgery. I was tending to Lucas an 18 month old mostly by myself. This was not a break!
We are a beautiful circus of chaos. We are fatigued and tired. With the ever changing benefits from my work, worldviews that are heavy and humans that make decisions that impact what we can and cannot control, life is heavy, it is tiring! But we continue on.
So, I appreciate memories like the one above from Facebook. In this instance, we are about to enter the world renowned Musée d’Orsay. We spent a whirlwind 2 days in 100 degree Fahrenheit (plus) heat! We ran around Paris, as a little vagabond family aloof of the cares of the world — about to return back to life. This was in 2013. Juniper didn’t join us until 2015. Since Juniper arrived we have added Astrid and Lucas, and are grateful! Tired, lifting to help others when and where we can and afford, and not disrupt our intrinsic family needs.
I share this because I suspect we are not alone in feeling this weight. The world, to be frank is F’ed up. The core values I was taught are often met with disdain. Especially from those circles of influence that directly or indirectly taught me. I have adopted the notion that
Unrealistic expectations are just future resentments!
and further, I lean to actions I can take. I observe that intentionally or otherwise that intellectualism only (talk — aka Acta non-verba) leads to inaction and more rhetorical gymnastics. This often ultimately leads to avoiding action. I mean, seriously, so it’s July, how is it that retail is willing to celebrate Christmas (sure its intention is monetary) but I observe even the most devout Christians despise a holiday – that at it’s core exemplifies the core beliefs of Christianity? I mean, if the Spirit of Christmas were top of mind all year, that could help more so than ever.
Training
I have 11 – 12 weeks. It’s time to hunker in and or down. I need to get the rest of my plan in training peaks and follow the script. Hopefully ready to survive and perform and then enjoy some family time after the Oct 23 event.
Here we go!
