The Messiness of life!
One of the more difficult decisions in life and triathlon training is when to be a critic and when to be a fan? The one thing I have learned, I can say. I can only be that to me. I keep my nose out of others business unless I am in a trusted circle and feedback is freely expected. Otherwise I wait. I have learned through sad experience that unsolicited feedback/advice is rarely leveraged. At work I tend to use this concept:
- Does it need to be said?
- Does it need to be said now?
- Does it need to be said by me?
Just as I want to be me and have control over my own life, and especially as a parent, I have to let others do similar – yes, even my kiddos. Opportunities for decisions and adaptations for change will come and go. The real question is do I choose to be the ‘chooser’ or the ‘choice’ (environmental, impacts from others, etc.) and own my agency between stimulus and response. This is critical. I have the choice to be a fan or a critic. I have chosen to concentrate on me. I turn inward.
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”
— Viktor Frankl
Tools come from stoic philosophy, my faith-based ideals and associated practices. I am grateful for my well of lessons learned from life, family and my sports hobbies. As a critic I take the feedback from those in my personal circles of influence, and then generalized feedback from beyond that. Seeking out and parsing what I can control, shape, change and monitor – I then get to work. Instead of just breathing, I try to live. I take looks back from time to time. Those looks serve for opportunities to cheer, to improve upon, or simply just be grateful. Gratitude has become an endearing ingredient to stability and a vehicle to be present.
Little by little. Day by Day
The Circle of Success
When I first encountered the above visual created by one of my current preferred authors, Ryan Holiday, it seemed too simple. While it is simple, it is not too simple. So, let’s keep it light an focus on triathlon. As I am preparing and gearing up and getting ready for a 140.6 Ironman triathlon distance in Sacramento California, keeping it simple is key! The biggest lesson learned is being vulnerable enough to allow failure to be a important part of the process. I find great value in those interactions. The crowd or mob is often screaming that the 140.6 is too big. It is EPIC and requires epic efforts. Buuuuut! I have found that its the simplest little choices that lead to the success. The overall incentive for me in the hobby of triathlon, is where I am able to practice and turn intellectual thought into practical practice and applications. Its a safe place – mostly – for me to learn what does or doesn’t work. I find that ‘the practice’ is what is missing in most intellectual Olympics. For example any triathlon plan looks awesome on paper, until your add in the human and interpret the data. If you are without a person apt to interpret the data and adapt the plan. Then all you have is a roadmap to failure. I play with data all the time. Yes, I am self-coached.
“Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen”
Brene Brown
A rehearsal (local triathlon to play at this weekend)
Logan Tri
This race will be at the Logan Aquatic Center. Welcome to one of the longest run triathlons in the state of Utah. Swim is in a pool, bike on a paved country road, run on a paved road with a canopy of trees and along the Logan River. Olympic is Swim, Bike, Run and Swim, Bike, Run again. F1 format. I am doing the sprint as I am concentrating on the transitions mainly and rehearsing the event dynamics. No expectations outside of FUN!
As I am building up to the 140.6, currently today I feel 70.3 ready. This weekend I am doing a sprint triathlon I am very familiar with. I am doing the sprint to remind myself of transitions. I did this last year with little formal training and it was good to feel uncomfortable. I had no expectations last year. This year I am focusing on transitions and making sure things go well there. Everything else is a bonus. Plus, I get to play triathlon and give my Race Director friend, Joe, a hard time. Here’s a shout out to his race company. On Hill Events. His events are well managed, properly permitted, supported by volunteers and a great opportunity to express fitness.
A Curious Unexpected Late Night Conversation
Last night I ran home after an aggressive pool session. A random stranger flagged me down. Mind you its near midnight in Logan, Utah – most of the town is asleep. This 31 y/o male flags me down from behind on his newly purchased city like scooter. He asked a question:
May I ask you a question?
Mark – local Logan resident
Surveying the scene and being at a fairly well-lit and prominent intersection just by the Logan Tabernacle and being a bit tired from my efforts. Sure, what would you like to ask? Tell me about that vest. Noxgear360 Tracer1 (note the link is tot he gen 2 versioning). I went on for a quick moment stumbling over a bit of fatigue and highlighting a quick story of gen1 vs gen2. Explaining the name and where to look for it. He asked a few more questions and then he rambled into parts of his current life story. Why he wanted a vest, and the info. The shorter version of the story. He just bought an electric city scooter and wanted more visibility. When he saw me pass by while he was at the White Owl – the local bar, he ran out jumped on his new scooter and caught me. He went on to tell me about his recent fights and challenges with skin cancer. how he feels he cheated as its not truly cancer – he shared a few stories of friends, both survivors and deceased, of more nefarious types of cancer. He told me about his ruined relationship where he learned much. We talked about stoicism, general state of life, and how its ok to be like Socrates and just ask questions to understand the human and life condition. One of the more interesting aspects of the conversation was me leaning into stoicism not my faith-based ideals and he brought up his own spiritual journey (a story about his Mission President). You know, I just let this guy talk and I added and strengthened the conversation. A little short of midnight, about 20 minutes later, we closed our conversations and I learned a glimpse about Mark during those few moments shared.
Just keep swimming
And that I have done. My swim last night was solid and strong. I am curious to see how I do with the 500 metres this Friday. I have been a bit stiff post work outs this week and I will close with this meme!
