What mask am I wearing today?
I got hurt, and I am recalibrating my ego, mindset and intentions
In the above youtube segment from Jim Carey he eludes to life having a reset button. He further eludes to how he uses it often. And so it is for me, I use terms like re-calibrate and reset. In the first week of 2023 I took my wife out for a few minutes we were alone. I took her bowling. We were having fun. It was the 10th frame and this happened:
@zentriathlete my groin snapped while my wife decided to film. not what I was expecting on date night. Whiskey tango foxtrot. ouch… @macylee36 #zentriathlete #bepresent #couplelove #couplecomedy #trilife #Teamzoot ♬ London Bridge – Fergie
Needless to say, a lot has changed and has been put on pause. A 2nd degree or severe strain to my lower right hip adductor (began PT and will use that as a guide to see if an MRI or suggested – so far no). Owwwwww!!! I don’t know what my next event will be or when. I am ok with that. What I am not ok with is uncertainty. Not that things are uncertain, no. Rather it is how uncomfortable I have become with uncertainty. It’s almost like I have apathetically tuned that out. It’s like I forgot that discomfort is part of the process. I’m in uncomfortable positions all the time, but because of practice and repetitions and the confidence I have gleaned through experience, mistakes and lessons learned, I fell comfortable into wisdoms froth.
I miss seeing the brilliance of life – when the world goes to sleep
You know, certain music and lyrics carry weight in different ways. There is a line in this song that cuts deep for me reflecting on a friend that chose to go far earlier, but he chose.
I miss seeing the brilliance of life after the world goes to sleep old friend. RIP Big Steve!
Growth mindset of being present and actionable today
The process and continual persistence to keep the past and the future separated is difficult and uncomfortable but worth it. Being indebted to the noisy chaos of yesterday’s stories – those previous decisions and exhausted resources are essentially sunk costs. I choose to recalibrate daily and not let yesterday’s irrelevance forge a camaraderie with the past – this ultimately prevents my investments today in tomorrow’s unknowns. Where I strive to be is present working through today’s horizon. Sculpting and cultivating today, being present is an exercise and with practice and purposeful actions, I can find a way and just be.
Strength, patience, empathy and courage are forged in this process. Finding my way. Leaving the past behind. Yes I am injured, but I finally gt to start rehabilitation. Tomorrow will be there, but what I do today will define tomorrow. Discomfort and opportunity are ahead. The obstacle is the way. Vulnerable but moving, hopefully in the right direction.
Even Atlas had to take a knee
Ok. Generally when I am trying to increase my empathy well, it doesn’t include a 2nd degree groin pull or potential tear. Yikes, it’s still very tender. The tendons snapping/popping is the most distressing feeling and or sensation and how it is so near crippling. Earlier this week, shoveling snow I went straight to pain tears, it was crushing and i was rendered to buckled over in half. The worst part is waiting for the orders to a PT and them to call me. Plus it was recently a 3 day weekend. Perfect storm. Well played universe.
HURT
Double whammy. This is not my year, yet. I am fighting what seems to be the flu and re- aggravated my injury. I know I tend to try and post more mindset and provocative and purposely thoughtful stuff. My apologies, I just can’t today. I will be getting my kiddos that I can to school then crawling into my pain and being sick.
Sometimes being human is about more than me, I’d appreciate any within my socials circles to check on liz and the kiddos…. and please check on others. I imagine I’m not the only one feeling Trent Reznor’s deep lyrics today.
Newsflash – I am dyslexic
I wanted to share a little TED talk about ‘dyslexia’ I forgot about.
Some or many know I am dyslexic (I tend to be quite open about the subject), but this video is an excellent way to describe some of my challenges – like an overuse of elipses in writing, to half thoughts, and/or zany but meaningful and purposeful cross topic connections and more….
I often see topics connect across topics (transference) and business matters quickly and I love/hate that burden. I do have a limited threshold while reading before things get difficult, so I appreciate having a bit more time to synthesize written information, but enjoy the privileges of remote work as an EdTech consultant.
I invite you to give this a watch if interested. It may help you understand me a bit better. Maybe not.
It’s ok to be bored (LinkedIn post)
Application of my practice/philosophy to a question from a friend
Curious: If I were to say “Charge the storm” or “Into the storm” what comes to mind?
Facebook question from a friend
When I encounter something, I have a choice that comes forward between stimulus and response, my agency is truly expressed here by ways of omission and/or commission. Often folks choose to avoid – this is just bad, as it often returns with cruelty and often with more noise and absurdity
So, I tend to choose at a minimum to acknowledge the ‘storm’ but not converse with it – the ‘let it go’ concept – not my doing, not my problem, unrealistic expectations, not enough to deal with, etc.
Or as Marcus explained, I can lean into the storm to learn why the obstacle is the way and through that challenge, opportunity, practice, frustration, gain wisdom from leaning in (may be stupid to do, but I still learn – mostly – lol ). Even absolutely absurd and wrong choices have high value if I use that experience to my advantage.
Here’s a loose example not endurance sports related etc. I suck at writing, but I have and keep a blog and write there. As a dyslexic, it is extremely difficult to read/write and make cohesive thoughts. But as I have been willing to be the fool, I have learned so much – this is my storm and/or my obstacle. While I tend to avoid reading, writing has helped me gain wisdom and discipline I have never earned before. Of note, I tend to listen to audiobooks, this helps my avoidance tendency as it relates to reading.
