20221107 – Life, balance – vlog update

vLog Update – Life, balance

Text to video thoughts above (Unedited, no styling)

Well you may be able to hear a little bit of noise in the background and that’s one of the reasons why I am doing this and posting it on my blog post. My blog post is mainly for me, so in this I’m sharing this mainly to me. But, I thought I’d also share content as I just kind of think things through. Typically, on my blog, I use it as a space for me again to journal my efforts that go with my Triathlon hobby the things that I kind of do as an ADHD and ASD parents I have four kiddos each and they range from almost 17 years old to just over to almost two and a half now and we have four of them and I have a wonderful life partner wife spouse and shenanigans tolerator of mine and I tolerate hers as well and was thinking a little bit more in the Life uh element and being present have a couple of work meetings that I have to work around we had an unanticipated Dental um appointment for my wife and I find it interesting sometimes how as

as I often speak to others I speak about a concept of ACTA non-verbal with the which is actions not words in Latin and trying to improve myself and iterate Lessons Learned across the different uh paradigms or vectors of life so I first of all will say I try to follow the concept of foreign driving and talking first of all no I don’t often do this but it’s a way to offload it but I practice uh this concept of unexpected sorry unreasonable expectations are often just future resentments and I keep finding that more and more and more I also talk to others about this concept of transference and so the capability of being able to transfer and use principles learned from various different disciplines skills and tactical or tacit knowledge Concepts and apply them to things outside of their point of reference and use those to my advantage another thing I often find in my observations and my practice is that no matter how well practiced I am you always have to plan for the unexpected and in framing expectations for example be adaptive and understand that sometimes plan one or a doesn’t always fit the need so being adaptable and able to um persistently iterate in a fashion that allows for mistakes and Lessons Learned and also for plenty of opportunities for success and reframing and recalibrating is just it’s just reality and the better that I am at that the better I don’t get lost in perceptions or things that are outside of my control or mis-framing things and not letting myself go too far down a rabbit hole uh personal Improvement and beating myself up either so one of the things of uh wanted to kind of throw in here I see a lot of people especially from the you know from work etc is people that will say um work life balance which I find is a complete sham and a complete lie um and I guess I need to turn here um but to that end any time that work is put first in front of work life balance that is the the motivator and the driver is work and that often is something that you cannot control because whether you’re a performer a contributor or a leader and you are in a servant Master paradigm uh worker the master no matter how much they frame it will always come first so one of the things I’ve concentrated on the last I would say decade is to really focus and concentrate first on life balance and so that Focus especially in the last few years is I’ve decided to take a more active participation in my hobby of triathlon and long course Endurance Sports specifically Triathlon and then you know whether it’s Swim Bike Run or just cycling or whatever the focus or the sport is at the time then those are the things uh it’s just anyways I have just had so much learning opportunity and growth that has come from participating in those Hobbies because it’s given me a practical lab as it were a space where I can practice and gives me a safe place to not only think and process but to actively experiment in a place that I can control factors for me and where I’m going with this is I just think it’s going to be unique to everybody as a parent or as a family participant to find out what that opportunity and lab space and practice space looks like and for me I’ve been able to really focus and find balance first in life to be able to do that because life is who I am you know I am a father I A.M a spouse and partner I am me I am a hobbyist that loves Triathlon and the difficulty work and other things that I learned from that um so yeah and I just wanted to share just some thoughts as I was I have my wife at a dental appointment as I mentioned and so I have my little guy that’s back here this little vibrant guy um but anyways uh and as we were just kind of playing with trains and trying to keep him occupied and happy and not freaking out and screaming and stuff like that you know my cousin’s little daughter uh not so little she’s got two Littles of her own was asking you know how can people not look at their kids and just see the opportunity they have and you know and I always talk about kind of the Eddie Pinero concept of you know there’s two fairy tales that most of the time folks get caught up and get lost in they get caught in the past and the reason why it’s a fairy tales it’s hard to change that it’s already happened and it is a story so the way to fix that is to work on yourself in the present and others sometimes and it depends it can be anywhere from five minutes too far in advance to way too far in the future but or they’re too far in the future and so again another fairy tale it’s not here yeah it’s a whole bunch of good wood should conditionals and the present determines that and so sometimes I’ve learned especially in the last little bit especially the last four or five years that really concentrating on the present allows for the past to be reconciled and resolved in for the future to come forward with whatever opportunities that may and to be able to be adaptive to be persistent to be able to iterate identifying mistakes along the way and getting better so well I wanted to keep this to about 10 minutes and just share a couple things um again work-life balance is a sham I think we have to start with life balance first start on herself turn inward work on yourself um that requires a little bit of selfishness but I think that a little bit of selfishness at first will turn into results and discipline that will allow us to be able to be present to be able to be courageous enough to let the past and the future um be what they need to be so that we can be in the present so we can become better through iterative growth and improving little by little and day by day sometimes that’s hour to hour or five minutes to five minutes but that allows us to have the opportunities in the Futures we may seek so here comes my wife